Well had a blast yesterday...even though my heart stopped a couple of times. We went with friends to a motorX race it was awesome, but my friends' son had a wreck and messed up his shoulder...and i just happened to be videoing the when it happened...it was scarey...but fun i had a blast. Eric went to work last night to cover a shift for a friend who is in the hospital so he is dead asleep right now. Only me and my thoughts...lol. Everyone is amazed at how well i am doing. If they could only see me at times like these where my mind has nowhre to go or nothing but her to focus on....I know shecwouldnt want me to mope around and be depressed all the time she would want me to move on and get better besides she is happy and playing with her family and friends up in heaven right now she is not sad or hurting so she would want me to be the same way...too bad its not always that simple...But everyday i get a little bit stronger and i move ahead just a little bit more. Its days like today where its just me on a gloomy morning with only my thoughts that i feel like im taking a few steps back instead of forward. I cant wait to be all healed up physically so i can get back to a normal pace and routine. When i had to take off accross the field yesterday i realized im not in as good of shape as i need to be...going to change that...gotta get healthier and get my weight down so i can try having another baby and get a hold of my life and maybe just maybe feel better about myself physically and emotionally. Also gotta get in shape cuz running like that liked to have killed me lol....you know you have great friends when something happens they are the first on scene and drop everything to make sure your ok...its nice to feel loved.
Yesterday the funnest part was watching the little kids race....OMG they were adorable!!! They were raceing thier little hearts out...it was too cute. They were giving each other hell out there.....btw Rori im with you i think me, niki and you will all just die if holli wrecks...lol she is too tough though so we know she will be fine but her is still our little girl...even if she is all tomboy lol that just means she gonna give them boys hell when she gets out there :-) . Well i guess im gonna lay back down for awhile see if this headache will find another place to go....i just want everyone to know that is reading this. I Love You all and each one of yall are special to me in your own way and I couldnt be who i am without each one of yall and thank you for everything. The prayers and shoulders to cry on and the funny moments and the im too emotional for my own damn good moments. And thank you for continueing this emotional rollercoaster ride with me. I am so greatful to have friends like you.
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